Many individuals never meet our expectations because we never accepted their reality. One has to ask himself/herself, “Am I dating this young lady’s potential or reality?” “Am I friends with who I think this guy is or who I want him to be or am I friends with who he really is?” “Is the way I expect this individual to act or respond realistic considering their present mental, emotional, spiritual realities?”
When we set expectations against an untrue or fictitious reality, we end up disappointed.
In relationships, we often have to let go of who we expected our partner to be in order to release them to be the person who they are or who they can be without our imposed limitations.
Sometimes letting go screams, “God, we cannot do it on our own, I cannot fix this, we cannot fix this, have thine own way!”; sometimes letting go means “I care about you so much and not that I do not care,”; other times it means, “I can’t protect you but I can release you to face reality with the one who can protect you – God”; and most times letting go in a relationship means to fear less and love more, to forgive more and embrace new beginnings, to trust the restorer of relationships – Jesus and faithfully face each day as a new day with each other.
Letting go of expectations also involves allowing the person to be who they are and to grow into who they can be. When we accept the reality of our loved ones, our love comes to the fore and our love gives our partners permission to be their best selves; our love gives them courage to see the same beauty, passion, strength and character that we see in them with their own eyes.
Are you letting go of who you expect your love interest and partner to be and accepting their reality for what it is?
(c) 2013, Dentrecia Blanchette